Excuse me, your pants never zip.

You know things are very wrong when the block where you live in starts to resemble a Lebanon refugee camp. The only difference between Lebanon and Hougang is, while they have Lebanon oil and petrol dollars, we only have cooking oil and Monopoly dollars.

Every morning when I make my way to school, I dread stepping into the lift because it looks like this,

I’m afraid that I’ll step into the lift as a human being and gets carried out by the undertaker as a corpse because you are very likely to be,

1. Stoned to death by your neighbour. (I’m living in a refugee camp remember?)

2. Chopped into 18 pieces by loan sharks. (I have the “borrow money from loan sharks” face); and

Even if none of the above happens, I may accidentally blow myself up by stepping on bomb bags thrown around by naughty neighbourhood kids.